People Skills for Analytical Thinkers: Boost Your Communication and Advance Your Career - and Life
by Eijkelenboom, Gilbert · 204 highlights
three main options: Complain Accept Change
that’s our emotional elephant speaking, choosing the easiest path. If we blame external factors, we don’t seem to bear any responsibility. It feels relaxing. Our elephant feels better after pushing away the responsibility.
changing the situation will require effort from your side.
changing the situation will require effort from your side. You need to use your rational brain — the rider — to steer the elephant in the right direction.
“What can we do to improve the situation?”
“What can I do to improve the situation?”
I started blocking the first two hours of each day in my agenda to work on the most important tasks.
I strived to minimize distractions in the morning as much as possible.
Rational impact: I got much more work done Emotional impact: I felt energetic, with a sense of progress and fulfillment
I could complain about other people for distracting me and planning those morning meetings. But how can I blame them if they don’t know my preferences?
I could complain about other people for distracting me and planning those morning meetings. But how can I blame them if they don’t know my preferences? That’s why I now proactively tell others that I am most focused in the morning.
Your environment determines the input of your algorithms. However, that doesn’t mean you are a victim of your environment.
Your algorithms are often triggered by the behavior of another person. And the other person’s algorithms are triggered by your behavior. To better understand these social dynamics,
The more you know about other people’s algorithms, the better you will understand the impact of your behavior on others.
When you ask about other people’s algorithms, you can show that you’re genuinely interested.
our algorithms consist of: Needs: what we want Beliefs: how we think we should behave to get our needs met We
our algorithms consist of: Needs: what we want Beliefs: how we think we should behave to get our needs met
The feeling of being part of a group, whether that’s on your team, in your department, or in the company as a whole.
A feeling of “I matter.”
Becoming the most you can be.