People Skills for Analytical Thinkers: Boost Your Communication and Advance Your Career - and Life
by Eijkelenboom, Gilbert · 204 highlights
Do you let your outdated fears rule your life? Or do you realize that we’re not cavemen anymore and start to optimize your algorithms today?
Algorithms are formed through our experiences in the
Algorithms are formed through our experiences in the world.
Algorithms are formed through our experiences in the world. We embed a belief about the optimal output given different types of input. In other words, we learn how we should behave in different types of situations.
If I openly disagree with someone, then the other person will be angry with me, and they won’t like me.
I learned how to deal with situations of tension: steer away from them, even if it means withholding thoughts and compromising on my standpoint. My emotional elephant chooses the easy path: avoiding a confrontation.
Since I thought that tension in social situations would always lead to angry people and disconnection, I also found it difficult to say no. I felt that I had to avoid saying no to stay away from tension.
Paradoxically, by saying yes, I got the results I was most afraid of: an angry face and a feeling of disconnection.
saying no can build relationships rather than tear them apart.
If I express my idea, then people will think I’m annoying and won’t like
If I express my idea, then people will
If I express my idea, then people will think I’m annoying and won’t like me.
If I make a little mistake, then people will not like me.
situations in your childhood can have a negative impact on your behavior today.
Most people aren’t aware of all their beneficial algorithms, because the behavior feels automatic and ordinary. Becoming aware of those positive triggers helps to maximize their impact.
more self-awareness makes you happier, more successful, more confident, and better at communicating with others. Eurich’s research also shows that 90% of
more self-awareness makes you happier, more successful, more confident, and better at communicating with others. Eurich’s
more self-awareness makes you happier, more successful, more confident, and better at communicating with others.
A more powerful thought is, “What could I have done differently?”
many people find it difficult to tell you what is on their mind. They don’t want to make you uncomfortable and are afraid that you’ll dislike them. Evolution, remember?