How To Be A Stoic

“Logic defeats anger, because anger, even when it’s justified, can quickly become irrational. So use cold hard logic on yourself.”

it just isn’t the case that every problem has a solution.

it just isn’t the case that every problem has a solution. We therefore need to cut ourselves some slack for not being able to solve everything, so long as we have done all we can reasonably do under the circumstances.

it just isn’t the case that every problem has a solution. We therefore need to cut ourselves some slack for not being able to solve everything, so long as we have done all we can reasonably do under the circumstances. Don’t focus on just finding a solution, the APA advises, but on how to handle the entire situation, including the possibility of not succeeding in the endeavor.

Rather than reacting immediately to what another person is saying—which is never a good idea, as doing so will simply escalate a heated situation—we can slow down, rephrase what the other person is saying, take the time to analyze the possible underlying reasons, and only then respond.

Sarcasm, an aggressive and belittling type of response, is rarely useful, and certainly not in those situations that involve conflict and anger. But how do we tell the difference between humor

Sarcasm, an aggressive and belittling type of response, is rarely useful, and certainly not in those situations that involve conflict and anger.

to live a good life we have to learn about how the world actually works (as opposed to how we wish it would work),

to live a good life we have to learn about how the world actually works (as opposed to how we wish it would work), and that we must also learn how to reason correctly in order to best handle the world as it is. Appreciating

to live a good life we have to learn about how the world actually works (as opposed to how we wish it would work), and that we must also learn how to reason correctly in order to best handle the world as it is.

‘What can this man want? If he did not want something which is not in his power, how could he still be anxious?

Loneliness] is such an innate part13 of the human psyche, that it cannot be solved like a puzzle; it can only be alleviated and made less painful. This can only be achieved by increasing humankind’s awareness of this distressing condition that everyone has to endure in some way, shape or form, sometime during their lives, about which there is nothing to be embarrassed.”

simply recognizing the truth of something is not enough: you need to practice it, over and over, until you develop a habit that incorporates a rational conclusion into your instinctual repertoire.

Think of practicing philosophy in the same way you learn to drive a car, or to kick a soccer ball, or to play the saxophone. Initially, it’s all about paying conscious attention to what you’re doing, and asking why, and as a result you are pretty bad at it, constantly making mistakes and getting frustrated. But little by little, the repetition of deliberate movements makes your actions more and more automatic, until it becomes second nature to hit the brakes when someone unexpectedly crosses the street, to pass the ball to your teammate who is suddenly unguarded by the other team’s defense, or to hit the right sequence of notes at the right pace to produce the melody you want out of your instrument.

True philosophy is a matter of a little theory and a lot of practice:

our ability to communicate with and understand each other depends on semantics—that is, on our accurate use of language.

A friendship of utility is what we nowadays would call an acquaintance based on reciprocal advantage—say, for instance, your relationship with your favorite hairdresser.

A “friendship of pleasure,” the second Aristotelian category of philía, is rather obviously based on (again, reciprocal) pleasure. Think of your drinking buddies, or people with whom you share a hobby.

a friendship of the good is that rare phenomenon when two people enjoy each other for their own sake because they find in each other an affinity of character that does not require externalities like a business exchange or a hobby.

Virtue is the highest good, and everything else is indifferent.