Radical Candor: Fully Revised & Updated Edition

She’d make us have debates as a team, but just before they started to feel tedious, she’d identify a “decider,” and ask that person to come back to the rest of us with a decision by a particular date.

you need to spend time listening to people in 1:1s, leading debates, and so on. But you need to learn to toggle between leading and executing personally. Don’t abandon the first for the second; integrate the two. If you get too far away from the work your team is doing, you won’t understand their ideas well enough to help them clarify, to participate in debates, to know which decisions to push them to make, to teach them to be more persuasive.

denial is actually the more common reaction to imperfect execution than learning.

“When the facts change, I change my mind.”

John Maynard Keynes’s idea that “When the facts change, I change my mind.”

You’ve got to take care of yourself, first and foremost.

Sometimes we’re overwhelmed by our work and personal lives, and these are the moments when it is hardest to learn from our results and to start the whole cycle over again. That’s why you are at the very center of the wheel that moves you forward as a manager. You’ve

Sometimes we’re overwhelmed by our work and personal lives, and these are the moments when it is hardest to learn from our results and to start the whole cycle over again. That’s why you are at the very center of the wheel that moves you forward as a manager. You’ve got to take care of yourself, first and foremost.

Your relationships and your responsibilities reinforce each other, and from that interaction your success flows and your culture grows.

The essence of leadership is not getting overwhelmed by circumstances.

Put the things you need to do for yourself on your calendar, just as you would an important meeting.

It’s natural to crave a little control. But power and control are illusory and won’t get you where you really want to go. Relationships are more effective, and more satisfying.

I’m not recommending abdication or anarchy. I’m not talking about simply ignoring the people who report to you, or letting them do whatever they want. You have a job to do. You have to guide your team to achieve results, and to do that you’re going to have to break ties and make tough decisions, often unpopular ones.

Sometimes, the greatest gift you can give your team is to let them go home.

trust is built on a consistent pattern of acting in good faith.

try to master your reactions to other people’s emotions.

If you feel guilty about the fact that they are upset, you’re more likely to have a defensive reaction than a compassionate one. Your defensive reaction can lead you, in turn, to unintentionally patronizing or cold behavior.

If, on the other hand, you can listen to the criticism and react well to it, both trust and respect will follow.

What about ‘criticize in private’?” But when you are the boss, that rule doesn’t apply to you.

everyone should embrace criticism that helps us do our jobs better.